Its Official

Well, I did it. I joined something to help me lose weight. I went with Weight Watchers for several reasons. One-cost. It is reasonable. Silly I have reached the point that I am paying someone to help me do what I know I need to and am suppossed to do but alas, that is one of my consequences. So I am glad that they offer an affordable program for me to utilize. Two-people's success at the program. I have never met anyone who did not lose on WW. They put up some incredible numbers. I was very disheartened by the number of people who gained back but I am hopeful that I am making a "habit" of eating healthy and exercising. I don't want to make all these changes and then go back. I do not want to stay this way. Finally-food choice. I like that I don't have to say no to things I want. Like yesterday, I ate Taco Bell. Normally, "dieting" I would have felt guilty and then eaten anything I wanted for the rest of the day BUT I used my allotted points didn't go over and didn't have to feel bad. So, I'll keep you all posted. As for me know, I think I am crazy because I had 5 kids who are fighting at the moment. Not really common for us but since the dynamics have been changing with who is home this summer and who isn't and what each kid is doing we have had a lot more of it going on. I'm beginning to think there is something to us being crazy ;-)

So I tried it for a month on my own and while I did stay pretty consistent with getting to the gym, vacation and eating out countered anything I tried. I feel like I did try. I even did workouts in the gym in the hotel while on vacation but then I ate everything in the city too so whatever. Today however starts the first day of the new me. I am praying it can last but honestly, I am trying just going at it one day at a time. No more when I'm skinny this or when I'm skinny that just I'm going to eat right today and I'm going to exercise today because I have to as a consequence of my historically bad choices. Friends and family have been very encouraging and supporting but I know that I need to do this for me in my way. Pray for me please.

200 Day Challenge Start Up

So, I'm not really challenging anyone else just myself and my obesity. I hate myself for letting it ever get to this point. I am huge!!!!!!! I weighed in this morning and by December 30th-200 days from now I will be a fraction of my former self. I am crazy for ever thinking that eating the way I've been eating and letting myself go were good ideas. Only God can help me now. I'd love an accountability group but I really don't know how to get one that will really work. I don't someone just being fluff with me or saying they will but not ever really doing it. I want to fix this. I have to fix this. So every 10 days I'll be weighing in. I'll be getting my exercise and I'll be making the change. Stay tuned!!!!!!!

Still Crazy After All These Years

They say that when you are upset or emotional a great activity is journaling. In this case, I am going to use blogging as a substitute. I am at work-no patients so don't worry, no one is being neglected for the making of this blog. I'd love to say that this was going to be cute or funny, but I'm devastated at the state of the world. I'm ready to declare that I'm not crazy this world is. I know we've known this for a long time and I know that is why I admitted a need for a Savior and gave my life to Christ but I'm still trying to figure out why everyone else hasn't caught on. I love that Jesus saved me. I love that I get to know Him and I love that I get to serve Him. I love that I can ask the Creator of the world to heal people, work in my life and use me to better the world I now find myself in. I HATE that I and those I love have to suffer the consequences of choices made by people that aren't willing to make the same choice about who Jesus is. It saddens and upsets me that people say and do things that they are so against the God I love and I ache for them knowing that some day they will have to stand before Him and see who He is and remember what they said about Him. I am heartbroken to read about crashed planes, molested children, dead girls who were bullied into ending their lives, starving children, sick children, abused women, a corrupt government-you name it-it is greiving me. Most of all, I am heartbroken to get a text from someone I love dearly and that I think is an amazing wife and mother and just incredible person and hear that this crazy world is turning their world upside down. That makes me crazy. . .